Loving and Giving

Writing about the upcoming arts and crafts festival at UNM Continuing Education got me thinking. As much as a sense of unease rises in my chest at the sight of artificial Christmas trees for sale in October, I tell myself to stop being a curmudgeon. It’s the holidays! Get in the spirit!

Time is moving too fast, I protest. Can’t I enjoy fall leaves and carved pumpkins before trimming the tree and singing carols off-key?

In fact, No, the universe answers (with a smile).

Fall is winding down, even though summer flowers are still blooming on my front porch. It’s time for gloves and shorter days and a huge turkey dinner before we begin the great slide down the hill of this year toward Christmas/Hannukah/Winter Solstice. Celebrations that remind us of light and darkness, our ancient past, and how to push through winter until the weather turns again.

The winter holidays hold the promise of light renewed. If we have the capacity to express love for others—family and friends, our community, the people and animals of the earth—then perhaps there is hope for us too, even during the coldest winter night.

During the winter holidays, we are encouraged to express our love with gifts. If heartfelt, and offered without expectations, the most delightful of acts. To give freely, with no thought of what will return to us is a true expression of the concept of the high heart, which expresses authentically, without bartering.

The high heart offers compassion for self and others, appreciation, perception without judgment, and forgiveness. It works within healthy boundaries and does not take responsibility for the behavior and feelings of others. (As you might expect, living in our high hearts is related to feelings of calmness, peace, and more integration of our physical systems, which leads to less stress)

The low heart can be judgmental, fearful, clinging, sympathetic, and prone to attachments. It lacks boundaries and wants “credit” for its good deeds. It expects gifts received to be commensurate with gifts given.

So in this season of craft fairs, holiday sales, and lists of gifts to purchase, I hope to maintain an attitude of appreciation for what I have. I choose to be grateful for the years on this earth I have been gifted with, to forgive those who have injured others, and to send love to all beings, no matter how misguided and off-track they may seem.

The holidays are a perfect time to take stock, see where we’ve been, and decide if we want to change the story of our life for the coming year. I’m starting now. Not with goals or resolutions, but intentions.

  •             I will love more
  •             I will write without fear
  •             I will trust my Creative Self to guide me through challenges
  •             I will appreciate
  •             And I will live the story of my life as honestly as I can

Winners and More Winners

My new book, When Spirit Whispers: a journey of awakening, is a winner in the 2022 New Mexico-Arizona Book Awards! I am excited and gratified to be honored by this excellent organization.

The book was a labor of love, my small offering of aid and inspiration to those traveling the path of personal discovery. Writing and publishing it was a lot of work and the award got me thinking about what being a winner means.

Awards and recognition are great, of course, but not the whole story. I haven’t entered many contests, partly because the submission fees can be considerable and the wait times long. I decided to go straight for publication and focused on getting short stories published while I was finishing my first novel.

After struggling to learn how to write publishable work, my first published short story was a huge win! My work was in print! And accompanied by beautiful art! It encouraged me to learn more about the market and how to hone my stories so they would be interesting to editors and publishers.

In the last twelve years, I have published many short stories, personal essays, and three novels. I also self-published a collection of short stories, The Way Home, several short pieces of fiction, and now, two nonfiction books, When Spirit Whispers and the When Spirit Whispers Workbook.

I appreciate being recognized by industry professionals, but even with the fancy sticker I get to paste on my book, it’s the reaction of my readers that warms my heart. When readers tell me how they react to my book, some finding validation and inspiration in its pages, all the struggle to write and publish is worthwhile.

So what is a win?

Awards, yes, of course. And getting your words in print, yes, is fun and validating.

But, wins take many forms, like:

  • Finishing a book/story/screenplay/poem
  • Expressing yourself in writing, art, dance, song
  • Enjoying a career you love
  • Creating a loving family
  • Surviving difficult life events
  • Surviving loss in any form
  • Getting through and adjusting to any difficult medical diagnosis
  • Healing old trauma
  • Thriving anew from the lessons of trauma
  • Finding the friends, healers, and playmates who see us for who we are
  • Speaking our truth
  • Allowing love to guide us, even when the world is careening off its axis
  • Learning to forgive
  • Finding joy in work, play, nature, animals, and all the wonderful people who are standing in the light of love

How do you feel about winning? What gives you pleasure? What is joyful? What are you proud of?

If you can name even one thing, then you’re already a winner.

All content copyright © 2023 by Carol Holland March. All rights reserved.